Friday, March 31, 2006

hmm just to update about last week. it was such a coincidence. not only did i bump into chris on thurs but on fri in the library too!!! two days in a row. haha i was so happy after that. yup but having procrastinated writing about it, the happiness just kinda subsided. goes to show that it's merely infatuation. today's finally the last day at rnt and i actually couldn't bear to leave cos most of them them (save the corporate side who actually were quite nice to me today) were super super nice!!! will really miss them. haha will definitely drop by to visit them if i have the time but i'm not sure if that would seem to be overdoing it. anyway, managed to get zhao rong's contact so i'm quite happy. let's see if we would be able to become better friends. bumped into ian and the other lawyer, marcus i think when i got into the lift to go to the 30th. that's coincidence number one today. then tried to find chris and mark on their floor but they weren't there so couldn't get their contacts. but surprise surprise who did i meet downstairs when i was waiting for my dad but chris!!! haha that's coincidence number two for me today. including last week's one, three coincidences altogether! haha. anyway other than feeling bittersweet, i actually feel very happy cos i enjoyed myself there. now i must see how to further the friendship with zhao rong, as in become closer friends. not sure if we'll get a chance to meet up but i'll try. shan't be too pushy and clingy though. realise i tend to become like that especially when it comes to guys that i have a good feeling about, as in nice guys, not necessarily must become really close kind. just good friends. think i scare them way. so anyway, don't think the friendship with chris would develop any further seeing that i bumped into him downstairs. was hoping that he would msg me to thank me for the chocolates. so even though i wrote in the note to him to stay in touch, i doubt he would. we'll see. as for mark, wrote the same thing but he still hasn't msged me to thank me. and he did ask for my number last time round so i'm not sure if he still has it. oh wells...anyways, i'm still in a pretty good mood so yay!!

:: Room on the 3rd Floor :: posted at 11:29 pm

Friday, March 24, 2006

i don't know what i want or what i'm looking for. somehow at each point in time, there'll always be someone. ben, chris, ian, zhao rong. my heart always skips a beat whenever i see zhao rong or ian. i even hope for them to talk to me. chris said hi to me today and asked how i was and i was elated. what's wrong with me. i know it's all infatuation. and i know i also say that i'm in no hurry and that the time will come one day. but i dunno it boils down to the same fact that i want to be loved and pampered by someone. ah!!!!! i dunno!!!!! so frustrating. heh and i was really happy when sui-yi and si-yi said that i was pretty. haha...so vain...

:: Room on the 3rd Floor :: posted at 12:39 am

Friday, March 17, 2006

who would have thought a simple night out like that would bring all feelings back again? but then i should have expected it. i know i got over him quite a while back but like i said then there's still a little feeling buried somewhere deep within me. love really is blind. i see his many flaws yet i'm still pretty much in love with his good points. and today i got irritated again as usual when he called out to lixin to sit down when he found some space so that we could watch the concert at esplanade. like it's always her first.of course during dinner when i got to the table, i didn't know he was there yet (the guys all look pretty much the same without hair!) then he said hi to me and i said a really simple hi back and that's it. i know it doesn't mean anything cos he's this friendly to everybody. somehow it seemed that our bantering today was much milder than usual. and i felt that he somehow tried to restrain himself on purpose. SIGH...stupid feeling's back again. darn i hope i get to meet a better guy soon then i can forget about ben. and it so doesn't help that he actually looks much better now aesthetic face value wise. can't say that he has improved much physical body wise cos he's still pretty thin as usual but his face somehow looks different maybe cos of the hair and he got braces for the upper set of teeth and surprisingly he looks very good and quite cute with them! oh no!!! but actually i can be 99.9% sure that he doesn't like me. the other 0.1% stems from the fact that i refuse to accept it. what am i gonna do?!?!

:: Room on the 3rd Floor :: posted at 11:21 pm